need for speed

finally got down to running. after days of procrastination. though was obviously lacking physically. the lacking of mentally was especially appalling. gotta work on it. couple of days left. havnt done much pt. hope life's not too tough next week. but right now. a terrible headache

and then i drew a blank

no need to be emptied cuz was empty all the while
small touches here and there will do it no good neither will it be harmed
it extends and expands
never to end
i started
but starting is never enough
i tried
but trying is never enough
i waited
and waited

is in its incoherence
the bottomless pit
of nothingness
holes in socks
in it
it out
reach
toes
out
to touch nothing
falling
and falling...

lost my mind

can't describe
nothing to hide
with will and might
none on my side
(as the chili peppers would have said, i could have lied)

makes me wonder

sun shines
sweat streaks
into my eyes
as i squint to catch that ray
wind caresses
gently urge the clouds
as they clear away
makes me wonder
what goes beyond
that piece of blue

night falls
clouds return
sky on fire
watch clouds burn
rain's coming
run for cover
look around
cant escape
not at tp2e
but that's where i'll go
where cats and dogs call
where the cold wind blows (and bellows)
soaked
shivers in the chill
makes me wonder
if i'll last through the night

you go down and down and want it out. but no, no you won't get it, not without any humilation first

1. try harder
2. try even harder
3. hit the bed